Remember this: If Mama Ain't Happy….Ain't Nobody Happy.
Women sometimes make fools of men, but most guys are the do-it-yourself type.
Bill Kerley, Houston, Tx.

Dear Algebra: Please stop asking us to find your X. She is never coming back,
and don't ask Y. Okay ?

Never Argue With a Woman Who Can Read, It's Likely She Can Also Think……
If You Obey All the Rules, You Miss All the Fun. Katharine Hepburn

We Never Really Grow Up, We Only Learn How to Act in Public.

The first thing I do every morning when I get up is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue. Dorothy Parker
When mankind was created, a delete button should have been installed at
the end of our tongues. Dear Abby.
The tongue is the only muscle in the body that is attached at only one end !

Today is The Present. Celebrate ! Be Daring, Refined, Do Well.

Ashes to Ashes…Dust to Dust...Life is too short…So Party We Must!
Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning, the devil says-Oh Crap, She's Up.
If you're going through hell, keep going. Winston Churchill (1874-1965)
(And if you're scared, don't show it, and you may get out before the
devil even knows you're there)…

You're Never Too Old To Learn Something Stupid. Duh!
Never Miss a Good Chance to Shut Up ! Will Rogers

It is better to walk alone, than with a crowd going in the wrong direction.
Diane Grant
Being a woman is not the same as being a lady. Christianne Mays
Always love a woman for her personality-we have 10-so you can choose.

Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the
street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.

Dancing will put a twinkle in your wrinkle ! Texas Polka News J

Nagging ? Of Course Not, it's called a 'motivational' speech.
Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.

When all is said and done, more is said than done. Lou Holtz, Coach.
It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent that
survives. It is the one that is the most adaptable to change. Charles Darwin
People often say motivation doesn't last. Neither does bathing-that's why
we recommend it daily. Zig Ziglar, motivational speaker 1926-2012
Is it true that you never really learn to swear until you learn to drive ?
Be Yourself. Everyone Else is Taken. Charles Schulz
Blocking calls
on our phones: means we never have to talk to a weird ex.

Heard: 'These days crabbin' and fishin' and holdin' on to a pot to piss in, is just
about the best a man can do
. James McMurtry, 54, singer/songwriter. 12-2015

We Do Not Inherit the Earth From Our Ancestors,
We Borrow It From Our Children . American Proverb

I Pray Every Night, and I Don't Ask for Much. I Just Say 'Thank You.'
Prince American musician. 1958-2016
In the immortal words of Lily von Shtupp: 'It's twue !'
Looking in the mirror, one chicken said to the other: 'Oh, Gladys, it's twue !
Chickens Don't Have Lips !' So much for having lipstick. …

Did You Know ? STRESSED Spelled Backward = DESSERTS Yay !
What Type of Monster Loves Dance Music ? The Boogie Man.

Say What You Will About the South: But No One Retires & Moves Up North .
We Luv Our Sunny South !
To Me, Old Age is Always 15 Years Older Than I Am. Francis Bacon
LOVE That Man !

Heard: 'I thought I would last longer than a carton of milk.' Said by:
Anthony Scaramucci, former White House communications director, in his first
interview since he was fired after 10 days in the position. Time Mag. 8-2017
Animals are much like humans in the sense that they feel and exhibit stress in
similar ways. Do not approach stray animals unless you feel safe. Displaced, frightened and potentially contaminated pets need to be handled by an animal control agency.
Please Help: shelters of all sizes need volunteers, food, supplies and foster
homes. Check with your local shelter to see what it needs most. Feed and walk
them at the same time every day, it will make their recovery faster.
When an animal is stressed, it may show a decrease in appetite, digestive issues, lethargy, and aggression. Heat also poses a threat to pets who might have to be outside. Panting and insides of ears turning red may indicate heat issues. A cool towel for them to lie on helps lower their body temp. Give water and access to shade. Houston Chronicle 9-10-2017 byline: Abby Trout
Check on your neighbors.
Some are alone, widowed, homebound by illness, or for any number of reasons. Ask if they need something, in terms of food, water or just a friendly voice.
Most likely they will resist, so do not insist.
At least give someone a call. Heloise Hints. Houston Chronicle
(Parenthesis notes : courtesy Betty Passini-Kite, editor.)

Cremation ? Caution: Story Not for the Faint of Heart.
If you are thinking about cremation when you leave this vail of tears, here's
something to think about. Choose carefully the facility you/your family will entrust with your remains. Regular inspections are rare in many states, four do
not require any inspections. Several funeral homes in the U.S. in recent years have
been forced to close after gruesome discoveries; following complaints.
Funeral Home Horrors: A Real Holloween Scare Story.
The dead can't complain, but on occasion--through rot-they scream for judgment
against the living entrusted with prompt and solemn cremation or burial. A Flint,
Michigan funeral home had been fined several times and faced multiple complaints
before having its licenses suspended.
The move followed an unannounced inspection in May that was spurred by news
reports that staff had mixed up two bodies. Prior to that, Michigan's attorney general had filed gross negligence, incompetence and other complaints in 2016
after ten bodies were found in a garage without any air conditioning.
Complaints also led to a closure this summer of Mortuary Services in Carlisle, Ohio, where a body that had been there since March 'begun to mummify,' and
another body had mold, according to an Inspector's Report. In Panama City,
Florida, Brock's Home Town Funeral Home, inspectors found 16 rotting bodies
in August 2016, after being contacted by the local sheriff's office.
Ohio's funeral board sends an inspector annually. Maine does random inspec-
-tions. North Carolina and New Hampshire require them every three years. No inspections are required in Alaska, Delaware, Iowa and Colorado. Florida inspects at least annually. Most states are struggling with budgets. It costs more money to
hire inspectors and hire better enforcement.
Houston Chronicle//Associated Press 10-29-2017 byline: Corey Williams
Happy Handyman:
STOP: Roof Leaks. Sometimes you have a good roof; just one area is causing
problems. The flashing around fireplace, shingles around the skylight, roof jack
around the vent pipe are all areas than can leak. Easy to fix with a product called
Through the Roof. Even if the roof is wet, just coat the area. Can also be used on leaky birdbaths and fountains to stop a leak.
The clear product comes in a brushable quart or gallon and a caulking tube. It will not show up on the roof. It will seal the leak for another 10 years. If the leak is around the fireplace, patio cover or vent pipe, use the heavier caulking formula.
HappyHandyman, 210-341-1573 Trudy Chuoke Home & Hardware, 2361 NW Military, San Antonio, Texas 78231
RLS: Restless Leg Syndrome.
Soap under the bottom sheet may not work for all cases of restless leg syndrome,
but we have heard from many people who find it helpful. The scent of Ivory soap
is effective against the pain of menstrual cramps (Journal of Alternative & Comp-
-lementary Medicine, July 2008) and fibromyalgia (Journal of Multidisciplinary
Healthcare). (At least, Ivory soap bars are less expensive than a prescription, and
you and your bedsheets will smell nice.)
We suspect that soap fragrance works by calming hyper-excitable nerves.
Joe & Teresa Graedon, The People's Pharmacy, 300 W. 57th St. 15th Fl.
New York, NY 10019 10-30-2017
Happiness Makes for Healthier You:
New research suggests that positive vibes are linked to a stronger body and mind as well as a more satisfied life. Here are eight science-backed tips to find more
joy in your life. Consider these:
Explore Life Without Social Media. Constant exposure may be taking a toll on the
human psyche. Trimming your social habit to just one platform may lighten your
load, and improve your mood. Even a short break has been shown to improve mood.
(Take a walk, enjoy a nature trail; visit a tiny, local green space.)
Order Delivery & Send Your Laundry Out. People felt happier when they bought
themselves free time than when they purchased a new item. It not only saves time
but also saves them from doing something they don't want to do.
(Hire someone
to clean your house twice a month.)
Let Go of Grudges. Forgive yourself and others. People that were quick to for-
-give themselves and others, had less mental stress and better physical health.
Take a vacation. Time away from work can help de-stress, feel happier and more
productive-as long as you spend it well. If not, a poorly planned vacation can
actually add to stress.
Deploy Random Acts of Kindness. Doing a favor or good deed can boost your
emotional well-being even if it is not recognized. Random acts of kindness can
make everyone happier, especially when recognized. Humans are wired to give.
Friends and Family. As people age, friends become more important to health and
happiness, according to research across nearly 100 countries. Both family and
friend relationships were associated with better health and happiness overall.
It's important to have people you can rely on, for the good and bad times.
A quick guide to happiness: Write a thank-you note. Get some sun, it may help
regulate mood by boosting serotonin, the chemical linked to calmness. Make a
grateful list. Do someone a favor. Do a mini-meditation to de-stress. (YES!)
Time Mag 10-2017
Sex Therapy: Who Goes and Why ?
The point of sex therapy is to help partners or spouses-and sometimes singles not
in committed relationships-regain an active and satisfying sex life. It is more
successful when done as a couple. More people could benefit from this specialized
therapy than actually seek it-sexual problems, including low libido, premature
ejaculation and erectile dysfunction, are more prevalent in the U.S. than the inci-
-dence of anxiety and depression combined.
One of the major causes of divorce in the first five years of marriage (whether it's
a first marriage or a second marriage) is sexual problems or dysfunction. Sur-
-prisingly, healthy long-marrieds tend to be more sexually satisfied than others,
even though they might not have sex as often as they used to.
Many spouses have trouble transitioning to a more humdrum existence where they view each other as life partners and intimate friends but begin to de-eroticize the other person. The most vulnerable time for couples to stop being sexual-defined as having sex fewer than 10 times a year-is within the first few years of marriage, after heady romance fades.
A study cited in the Journal of Marital & Family Therapy reports that contented
partners attribute only between 15% & 20% of their happiness to a pleasing sex
life, while unhappy mates ascribe 50% to 70% of their distress to sexual problems.
Nudity or sexual touching is not part of office-based therapy sessions. Talk therapy
is front and center, helping couples identify the anxiety, inhibitions and/or unrealis-
-tic expectations that interfere with their sexual pleasure. Sex therapist will assure
patients that they won't be pressured, explain that partners need to understand each
partner's psychological, relational and sexual strengths and vulnerabilities.
For most couples, weekly sessions continue for 3 months to a year; sex therapists
assign partners homework following each session. Homework typically includes
talking, touching and setting up erotic scenarios. About half of sex therapy takes
place in the couple's home.
Many partners silently worry that their mate wouldn't love or respect them if they
knew their deepest sexual secrets-unusual turn-ons, colorful histories, long-ago
rape or abuse, or a sexually transmitted disease. Confronting these issues in sex
therapy typically reveals acceptance, not intolerance. Partners learn that their
secrets no longer control them.
Finding a qualified sex therapist is not always an easy task. Most marital therapists are not trained to deal with sexual issues directly. In traditional couples therapy, sex problems are almost always considered to be a symptom of relation-
-ship problems, so sexual attitudes, behaviors and feeling are not directly add-
-ressed. Also, most states don't have licensing requirements for sex therapists.
To find the right therapist, look for a practitioner who: has a degree in mental
health, such as a PhD or a master's in social work (MSW). Certified by the
AASECT to practice sex therapy. Has at least three years of experience working
with couples-including significant experience dealing directly with sexual issues.
It is worth the effort to find a therapist whom both partners like and respect.
BottomLineHealth 3-2017 byline: Barry McCarthy, PhD, American University,
Wash. D.C. Professor of Psychology, Diplomate in clinical psychology and a
certified sex and couples therapist who has practiced for 42 years. Received
the Masters & Johnson Award in 2016, for lifetime contributions to the field
of sex therapy. Author of 14 books, including Sex Made Simple and Re-kind-
-ling Desire,
has presented more than 400 professional workshops in the
U.S. and internationally.
Best Beauty Products: Drugstores/Walmart/Target.
Cover Girl LashBlast Mascara: no clumps. $9.
Eye shadow: glitter, shimmer, matte finishes. $10.
L'Oreal Paris Original Mascara: no clumps or smudges. $7.50 .
Lipstick: more than 100 shades. Urban Decay. $17.
Maybelline Eyeshadow Palette: six wearable shades. under $10.
Nivea Body Lotion: leaves a gleam on shoulders/legs. $6.
Nugg Exfoliating mask: single use pads, great for travel. $18 for five.
Pixi Beauty Glow tonic: toner w/glycolic acid for smooth skin. $15.
Revlon Ultra HD Matte Lipcolor: $9.
Real Simple Mag 10-2017
About Those Tatts:
Research in Scientific Reports found that in autopsies of four corpses with tattoos,
nanoparticles of titanium dioxide-a possibly carcinogenic ingredient found in
tattoo pigments-had appeared in the lymph nodes. But more research is needed
to assess possible dangers. Time Mag 10-2017
Merriam-Webster New Words:
More than 250 new terms and definitions has been added to its online dictionary
in October, with many reflecting the U.S. political climate. Here are three:
pregame: verb, to begin drinking alcohol before a game or activity; gained use
as a verb among college students. (Had been used as an adjective for over 100
ransomware: noun, malicious software that requires victim to pay a ransom to
access encrypted files.
schneid: noun, a losing streak, as in sports. The etymology of the word appears
to be a diminution of the German word schneider (tailor), used in card games of
a player who fails to score any points. Time Mag 10-2017

Until God Opens the Next Door for You-Praise Him in the Hallway.
How Should We Pray ?
Pray as you go, wherever you go. P. R.A.Y.
P: Praise-Thank Him for who He is, what He's done, and what He's promised
to do.
R: Repent-Admit the ways you have sinned against Him and commit to change.
A: Ask-Ask for His help, wisdom, and action in your life and the lives of others.
Y: Yield-Express your trust in Him and surrender to His plan for your life.
The Good News 11-2015

There are two excellent theories for arguing with a woman.
Neither one of them works. Will Rogers Just so you know.
When arguing with your wife, you can always get the last word: 'Yes, Dear.
You're right. I am sorry'.
Walt Canty, Kingwood

May Your Troubles be Less, May Your Blessings be More..
May Nothing but Happiness Come Through Your Door. Billy Graham

It is never too late to learn how to have fun on the dance floor.

Thank you for tuning in to the Entertainment News and thanks for referring your friends to
We appreciate your input. Let us know if you have comments, compliments or otherwise. Be Sweet Now.

Best Regards to you and yours. Betty & Ed